Let’s Talk About our Emotions
What does “emotional intelligence” look like for a Christian? How as a Christian do we manage our emotions? How do we stay balanced in the Lord in our emotions? How do we manage our emotions?
There is a difference between having emotions and being emotional. When you are not emotional people tend to think you don’t have emotions but of course you do. We all have emotions. These emotions have to be processed through. There is a difference between sweeping your emotions under the carpet and processing through your emotions quickly so you don’t “stay” in a place with your emotions and in turn become emotional.
Psychology uses a phrase called “emotional intelligence.” Emotional Intelligence measures how well you manage your emotions. We all have a measure of what I would call EI (emotional intelligence) similar to an IQ (intelligence quotient) which measures your human intelligence overall.
I believe there’s a process to EI maturity. There’s a learning curve to managing your emotions. It may come easier to some than others based on personality differences but it is something that is attainable by all of us. One of the fruits of the Spirit in Galatians 5:22-23 is self-control. The KJV says “temperance.” Temperance definition in the dictionary is “moderation; patience; calmness; sedateness; moderation of passion.” We are, according to the Word of God to respond in moderation and not fly off the handle. This is an evidence of being “controlled” by the Holy Spirit. #selah
EI maturity is being able to recognize and know your emotions, which I think most of us do, BUT then to take that a step further and manage your emotions. This is where the shift from having emotions to being emotional come in to play and our EI is exposed sometimes just to us and at other times for all to see.
I promise you this, maturing in your EI is a key factor to a lot of your success in life, most definitely in the relationships around you. When you allow your emotions to cause you to become emotional and then in that place of being emotional your emotions rule you instead of you ruling your emotions (being self-controlled, being tempered) you end up robbing yourself and truthfully you also rob those closest to you.
You’re not supposed to be hot-tempered, you’re not supposed to fly off the handle (anger), you’re not supposed to remain in a place of discouragement, sadness, grieving. These are all emotions that are experienced and are real. All these emotions are given to you by God but you are supposed to manage them, process them in a healthy manner and release them.
It’s so important to learn how to manage your emotions and my heart today is that you take away a few nuggets that can help you. Philippians 4:6,7 is a key to that. Allow this to penetrate your heart and become a mainstay in your daily walk! Philippians 4:6,7 (amp) “Do not fret or have any anxiety about anything, but in every circumstance and in everything, by prayer and petition (definite requests), with thanksgiving, continue to make your wants known to God. And God’s peace [shall be yours, that tranquil state of a soul assured of its salvation through Christ, and so fearing nothing from God and being content with its earthly lot of whatever sort that is, that peace] which transcends all understanding shall garrison and mount guard over your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.”
You are not supposed to be anxious for anything! I’m not saying you don’t have anxiety come upon you BUT when it does you are to recognize it quickly and give it to the Lord. You recognize “I’m beginning to feel anxious, worried, sad, etc...” and you immediately go to God with whatever it is that is causing you to begin to feel anxious, concerned, sad, etc. This will be a process of training both your mind and your heart to do this. BUT as you meditate on Philippians 4:6,7 you’ll notice there is a promise of peace if you can mature to the place that you recognize your emotions are beginning to shift to a place of being emotional and you quickly turn to God with a THANKFUL heart and lay your concerns at His feet. Again, this is a process! Don’t expect to have it down pat next week but as you continue in the process you most definitely will see yourself turning your heart and your thoughts over to the Lord faster than before.
Something to be reminded of Proverbs 15:18 “A hot tempered man stirs up strife but he who is slow to anger quiets contention.” So, so good! You are not supposed to just react to situations. You are supposed to step back and respond.
Allow your emotions that get out of control be a red flag to you that you need to ask God to test and try your heart and allow Him to show you any areas that are not pleasing in His sight. David asked this of God in Psalm 139:23-24 (amp) “Search me [thoroughly], O God,and know my heart! Try me and know my thoughts! And see if there is any wicked or hurtful way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.” Truthfully, we don’t like to be tested, tried and shown truth! It’s not an easy process but the reflection of gold we emulate on the other side if we allow ourselves to be put through the fire of God’s examining eye is well worth the uncomfortableness of the heat being turned up.
I don’t want this blog to get too long so I will close out with this final point and scripture in Galatians 5:16. THIS IS SO KEY FOR ALL OF US IN EVERY AREA OF OUR LIFE, NOT JUST OUR EMOTIONS, EVERY SINGLE AREA OF OUR LIVES. THIS SCRIPTURE VERSE SHOULD BE OUR MOTTO...”But I say, walk and live [habitually] in the [Holy] Spirit [responsive to and controlled and guided by the Spirit]; then you will certainly not gratify the cravings and desires of the flesh (of human nature without God). Walk by the Spirit, be convicted by the Spirit, respond to the correction of the Spirit, yield to the Spirit when He’s showing you a truth of your heart. You know that unctioning inside of you that says “don’t go there, reel it in, pull those thoughts back, you know that’s not truth, stop that thought train from running off the tracks or even picking up speed” that stirring inside you when you’re about to respond in a way that is not self-controlled, not tempered? Listen to it, let it correct you, don’t choose to ignore the Spirit trying to guide you into all truth and go your own way in a moment of pleasing your flesh.
No, instead, walk by the Spirit and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh. Allowing your emotions to shift you into a place of becoming emotional is gratifying the flesh. It’s responding to your feelings, how you want to in that moment “just because”. There is a constant battle going on inside of all of us at all times. The closer we walk with the Spirit the less we will be ruled by emotions allowing ourselves to become emotional and the further we walk from the Spirit the more we will be ruled by our emotions and the more likely we will be to become emotional on a regular basis.
Again, I want to encourage you that this is a process and not a one time event. EI maturity is something we grow in to over time especially if we are someone who has lived a life time of allowing our emotions to rule us instead of us ruling our emtions. Also, please remember I am not saying to ignore your emotions rather I am saying to recognize them, process them quickly by going to God sooner rather than later and simply be honest with Him about your emotions.
There is a difference between having emotions and being emotional. When you are not emotional people tend to think you don’t have emotions but of course you do. We all have emotions. These emotions have to be processed through. There is a difference between sweeping your emotions under the carpet and processing through your emotions quickly so you don’t “stay” in a place with your emotions and in turn become emotional.
Psychology uses a phrase called “emotional intelligence.” Emotional Intelligence measures how well you manage your emotions. We all have a measure of what I would call EI (emotional intelligence) similar to an IQ (intelligence quotient) which measures your human intelligence overall.
I believe there’s a process to EI maturity. There’s a learning curve to managing your emotions. It may come easier to some than others based on personality differences but it is something that is attainable by all of us. One of the fruits of the Spirit in Galatians 5:22-23 is self-control. The KJV says “temperance.” Temperance definition in the dictionary is “moderation; patience; calmness; sedateness; moderation of passion.” We are, according to the Word of God to respond in moderation and not fly off the handle. This is an evidence of being “controlled” by the Holy Spirit. #selah
EI maturity is being able to recognize and know your emotions, which I think most of us do, BUT then to take that a step further and manage your emotions. This is where the shift from having emotions to being emotional come in to play and our EI is exposed sometimes just to us and at other times for all to see.
I promise you this, maturing in your EI is a key factor to a lot of your success in life, most definitely in the relationships around you. When you allow your emotions to cause you to become emotional and then in that place of being emotional your emotions rule you instead of you ruling your emotions (being self-controlled, being tempered) you end up robbing yourself and truthfully you also rob those closest to you.
You’re not supposed to be hot-tempered, you’re not supposed to fly off the handle (anger), you’re not supposed to remain in a place of discouragement, sadness, grieving. These are all emotions that are experienced and are real. All these emotions are given to you by God but you are supposed to manage them, process them in a healthy manner and release them.
It’s so important to learn how to manage your emotions and my heart today is that you take away a few nuggets that can help you. Philippians 4:6,7 is a key to that. Allow this to penetrate your heart and become a mainstay in your daily walk! Philippians 4:6,7 (amp) “Do not fret or have any anxiety about anything, but in every circumstance and in everything, by prayer and petition (definite requests), with thanksgiving, continue to make your wants known to God. And God’s peace [shall be yours, that tranquil state of a soul assured of its salvation through Christ, and so fearing nothing from God and being content with its earthly lot of whatever sort that is, that peace] which transcends all understanding shall garrison and mount guard over your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.”
You are not supposed to be anxious for anything! I’m not saying you don’t have anxiety come upon you BUT when it does you are to recognize it quickly and give it to the Lord. You recognize “I’m beginning to feel anxious, worried, sad, etc...” and you immediately go to God with whatever it is that is causing you to begin to feel anxious, concerned, sad, etc. This will be a process of training both your mind and your heart to do this. BUT as you meditate on Philippians 4:6,7 you’ll notice there is a promise of peace if you can mature to the place that you recognize your emotions are beginning to shift to a place of being emotional and you quickly turn to God with a THANKFUL heart and lay your concerns at His feet. Again, this is a process! Don’t expect to have it down pat next week but as you continue in the process you most definitely will see yourself turning your heart and your thoughts over to the Lord faster than before.
Something to be reminded of Proverbs 15:18 “A hot tempered man stirs up strife but he who is slow to anger quiets contention.” So, so good! You are not supposed to just react to situations. You are supposed to step back and respond.
Allow your emotions that get out of control be a red flag to you that you need to ask God to test and try your heart and allow Him to show you any areas that are not pleasing in His sight. David asked this of God in Psalm 139:23-24 (amp) “Search me [thoroughly], O God,and know my heart! Try me and know my thoughts! And see if there is any wicked or hurtful way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.” Truthfully, we don’t like to be tested, tried and shown truth! It’s not an easy process but the reflection of gold we emulate on the other side if we allow ourselves to be put through the fire of God’s examining eye is well worth the uncomfortableness of the heat being turned up.
I don’t want this blog to get too long so I will close out with this final point and scripture in Galatians 5:16. THIS IS SO KEY FOR ALL OF US IN EVERY AREA OF OUR LIFE, NOT JUST OUR EMOTIONS, EVERY SINGLE AREA OF OUR LIVES. THIS SCRIPTURE VERSE SHOULD BE OUR MOTTO...”But I say, walk and live [habitually] in the [Holy] Spirit [responsive to and controlled and guided by the Spirit]; then you will certainly not gratify the cravings and desires of the flesh (of human nature without God). Walk by the Spirit, be convicted by the Spirit, respond to the correction of the Spirit, yield to the Spirit when He’s showing you a truth of your heart. You know that unctioning inside of you that says “don’t go there, reel it in, pull those thoughts back, you know that’s not truth, stop that thought train from running off the tracks or even picking up speed” that stirring inside you when you’re about to respond in a way that is not self-controlled, not tempered? Listen to it, let it correct you, don’t choose to ignore the Spirit trying to guide you into all truth and go your own way in a moment of pleasing your flesh.
No, instead, walk by the Spirit and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh. Allowing your emotions to shift you into a place of becoming emotional is gratifying the flesh. It’s responding to your feelings, how you want to in that moment “just because”. There is a constant battle going on inside of all of us at all times. The closer we walk with the Spirit the less we will be ruled by emotions allowing ourselves to become emotional and the further we walk from the Spirit the more we will be ruled by our emotions and the more likely we will be to become emotional on a regular basis.
Again, I want to encourage you that this is a process and not a one time event. EI maturity is something we grow in to over time especially if we are someone who has lived a life time of allowing our emotions to rule us instead of us ruling our emtions. Also, please remember I am not saying to ignore your emotions rather I am saying to recognize them, process them quickly by going to God sooner rather than later and simply be honest with Him about your emotions.
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