What is a Good Marriage?
What's a good marriage? How would you define it in your mind? Is it a spouse that makes you "happy." What is making you happy? Is it meeting your every desire and whim? Is that a good spouse?
I beg to differ. I believe a good spouse is one that, yes, knows your desires, knows your likes, knows your wants and from time to time randomly surprises you with such. I see (mostly wives) post that they have the "best" husband in the WHOLE world. Really?? That's a pretty big role to fill and yet an expectation that especially young brides place on their husbands. This statement is usually made after their husband has "made them happy" about something. I don't believe there is any "best in the whole world" husband out there. I believe he or she is the best for YOU even in the most when he or she is not giving into your tantrums and/or hissy fits.
A good spouse challenges us in our weak areas. A good spouse is willing to point out to us what others are not. A good spouse uses wisdom in their marriage to major in the major and minor in the minors. A good spouse passes on their own "feelings" or "desires" from time to time for his or her family.
First of all, I want to encourage you to stop comparing your spouse and your marriage to others. This is so damaging to our demands and expectations that may not even be the true picture anyway. Certainly don't get frustrated at your spouse because of a Facebook post someone made in their good season of marriage when you're in a rough patch. I think Facebook is the soap operas of today for marriages.
There will be a "better" and there will be a "worse" in your marriage and it is so much more IMPACTING how you respond in the "worse" than in the better. It says more about how you truly feel about your spouse, about how deep your love goes. Do you, will you love them at their worst?
Oh, in "sickness and in health" yup there will be both! Again, it is how we react in the sickness that really speaks of our character and our commitment. Will I nurse and take care of you and you me in a way we never thought we would and, for some, maybe even much earlier in life than you thought would be necessary.
One more, the whole "richer and poorer" because that will be there too. We look at a financially sound couple or a couple that seems to not have any financial strain. I promise you it's been there, the tough days, the panic of "how are we going to pay this or that?" My husband and I have had seasons of having no clue how to even have enough for the groceries to paying bills the moment they come in with change to spare. Again, if you're picking up on a theme it is in the "poorer" that the marriage is strengthened. Is it difficult, yes! Are there many "heated" discussions, yes! But, as the saying goes, this too shall pass.
Everything is always good in the easier seasons it is in the difficult seasons that your marriage is truly forged and fortified. This is where the intimate relationship is anchored and grows to an unpenetrable bond from the outside.
My desire for each marriage is to be able to look at the one you married when you hit the "20" the "25" the "30" year (and even beyond) mark and say in your heart, not just on a Facebook post, but truly in your heart "this is the one I would want to do it all over again with!" That, my friend, is a GOOD MARRIAGE!!
I beg to differ. I believe a good spouse is one that, yes, knows your desires, knows your likes, knows your wants and from time to time randomly surprises you with such. I see (mostly wives) post that they have the "best" husband in the WHOLE world. Really?? That's a pretty big role to fill and yet an expectation that especially young brides place on their husbands. This statement is usually made after their husband has "made them happy" about something. I don't believe there is any "best in the whole world" husband out there. I believe he or she is the best for YOU even in the most when he or she is not giving into your tantrums and/or hissy fits.
A good spouse challenges us in our weak areas. A good spouse is willing to point out to us what others are not. A good spouse uses wisdom in their marriage to major in the major and minor in the minors. A good spouse passes on their own "feelings" or "desires" from time to time for his or her family.
First of all, I want to encourage you to stop comparing your spouse and your marriage to others. This is so damaging to our demands and expectations that may not even be the true picture anyway. Certainly don't get frustrated at your spouse because of a Facebook post someone made in their good season of marriage when you're in a rough patch. I think Facebook is the soap operas of today for marriages.
There will be a "better" and there will be a "worse" in your marriage and it is so much more IMPACTING how you respond in the "worse" than in the better. It says more about how you truly feel about your spouse, about how deep your love goes. Do you, will you love them at their worst?
Oh, in "sickness and in health" yup there will be both! Again, it is how we react in the sickness that really speaks of our character and our commitment. Will I nurse and take care of you and you me in a way we never thought we would and, for some, maybe even much earlier in life than you thought would be necessary.
One more, the whole "richer and poorer" because that will be there too. We look at a financially sound couple or a couple that seems to not have any financial strain. I promise you it's been there, the tough days, the panic of "how are we going to pay this or that?" My husband and I have had seasons of having no clue how to even have enough for the groceries to paying bills the moment they come in with change to spare. Again, if you're picking up on a theme it is in the "poorer" that the marriage is strengthened. Is it difficult, yes! Are there many "heated" discussions, yes! But, as the saying goes, this too shall pass.
Everything is always good in the easier seasons it is in the difficult seasons that your marriage is truly forged and fortified. This is where the intimate relationship is anchored and grows to an unpenetrable bond from the outside.
My desire for each marriage is to be able to look at the one you married when you hit the "20" the "25" the "30" year (and even beyond) mark and say in your heart, not just on a Facebook post, but truly in your heart "this is the one I would want to do it all over again with!" That, my friend, is a GOOD MARRIAGE!!
Great Blog
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